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ANGER
Lion of God
When the chaos of the mind
Lies dark and jarring,
Convulsed and hard to find,
Mashed and tangled webs of remorse,
Seek the friend of love from birth of yore
To comfort you forever more.
___copyright© charles schwartz 2007______________________________ Anger is Us? People do not always speak or act as we would wish. As a result, we sometimes feel impelled to embark upon a rough road of anger or disappointment. But there is another path -- a high road -- that bypasses anger and strife and leads instead to a life of tranquility. That road is marked by the well-known phrase, "the benefit of the doubt." Seeing someone else's mistake in the best light does not mean we are naïve. It means we have the insight to know that misunderstanding, inexperience, worry and stress are usually behind the offending acts of otherwise well-meaning people.
The high road. That's just it! The dreary road of anger, resentment, and revenge is a well-trodden, dusty one. It's the road people travel most because it's the easiest route. It takes a millisecond for my mind to shift into "insulted mode," and a snub is automatically accompanied by a physiological reaction that gets my adrenalin flowing and my heart pounding faster.
But our Sages tell us there is a way to escape the bondage of anger and aggravation. Simply by reprogramming myself, I can free my mind, heart, and spirit from the physical and emotional dangers of stewing and judging. I can take a deep breath and say:
"Hmmmmm, it's very unusual for that person to treat me that way. He must be having a bad day."
"I know he probably didn't notice that he accidentally stepped on my toe."
"She didn't realize that she cut in front of me in the line."
In short, why should I judge someone favorably if I'm certain that their actions are dishonorable?!
Beneath this question lies the answer, to practice a little humility and patience. The truth is that when I judge favorably, the real benefactor is me. I save myself from the headache and heartache of anger and resentment. I avoid the pitfalls of revenge, harboring hatred, and speaking gossip (all of which are forbidden by the Torah). In short, I stand to lose the most when I do not judge favorably.
| A word can be more powerful than anything.
SQUANDERING?
a charlie poem
Scorn, slander and strife pour from his lips,
like coins tossed to beggars,
as his words blast
into the hearts of his victims,
to nullify his charities of a lifetime.
now he realizes he wasn’t rich at all,
recounting washed away deeds,
that fed many stomachs,
while destroying their souls,
as he left victims with melted rewards.
his measure of profits is not sublime,
for no one rejoices and thrives at a time when one’s clouds changes to gray, and hope dies as despair
inters all roads toward better days.
It is not revolutions and upheavals,
nor their revelations, but words of torment of someone's soul,
that ferments and blazes beyond the blackest of clouds from the blue,
that one’s poison tongue betrays.
Copyright © 2005 Charles Schwartz
| A word can be more powerful than anything.
Diamond Processing by Dr. Abraham Twerski
The Mishnah [Ethics of the Fathers 4:3) teaches us: [Ben Azzai] was accustomed to say: "Do not be scornful of any person, and do not be disdainful of anything, for you have no person without his hour, and you have no thing without its place."
Rabbi Shalom Dov of Lubavitch showed great affection for the simple folk. One time, a chassid who was a diamond merchant asked the rabbi what virtues he saw in these unlearned people.
The rabbi asked the chassid whether he happened to have any of his merchandise with him, whereupon he showed the rabbi a packet of diamonds. The rabbi pointed to a rather large gem and said, "That is indeed a beautiful diamond."
The chassid smiled. "No, rabbi," he said, "it happens to be full of defects."
"But it is more beautiful than the other stones," the rabbi said.
The chassid explained, "It happens to be larger than the other stones, but because it has defects which can be seen with a magnifying glass, its value is much less. Now here," he said, "is a smaller stone that may not appear as brilliant as the larger one, but it is a perfect stone, and is very valuable. You see, rabbi, to know the value of diamonds one must have expertise."
"I understand," Rabbi Shalom Dov said, "but the same thing is true of knowing the value of people, where one must also have great expertise."
Author Biography:
Dr. Abraham Twerski is a psychiatrist and founder of Gateway Rehabilitation Clinic in Pittsburgh, a leading center for addiction treatment.
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